Jelly Bean Pancakes and Coffles
by Connecticut Junkie
Summary: Lorelai tries to make breakfast. CT Junkie tries to make Spanish fic. Of course, both of us are out of our minds. Tune in for when Experiments Go Wonky. Future Fic. (ENGLISH VERSION)
1. We don't need no stinking english!

Author's Note: Okay. So I noticed that there wasn't a single fic for Gilmore Girls in Spanish. And I felt like maybe, there should be at least ONE. So I wrote one. (It's posted already, but you have to look under Spanish). But I used a translator thing because while I speak Spanish, I don't write it well. And then I decided to translate the translation back to English. And what I got was this...which made me laugh a lot.   
  
So I figured I'd post this version AND the original, non-insane English version as the next chapter.   
  
So: Chapter One, Crazy Translated version. Chapter Two: Normal version.  
  
But EVERY Version is just a sick little piece of fluff that I wrote in under ten minutes.   
  
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Title: It cheers Beancakes and Coffles  
   
Author: Connecticut Junkie  
   
Summary: Attempts of Lorelai to cook the breakfast. Of course, with Lorelai, the breakfast is even strange.  
   
Degree: G  
   
Note: I noticed that there was fics of no GG in Spanish, so me whipped this for above. And yes, it really made crepes and Coffles de Jellybean before. They are heavy.  
   
Negation: These characters are not mine and they have bent its pleasure of the reading.  
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Luke entered the kitchen, and its surprise it saw that Lorelai cooked.  
   
"Okay. I must be that it dreams or insano."  
   
"Vote for madness," said Lorelai, trying to move of a pull one crepe.  
   
"That hell is that one" Luke requested, because he obtained a good Vista of crepe said (if that could be called.)  
   
"Is one crepe, idiot," talked back Lorelai, then given return far from her who cooks (if good day could be called that) to give a kiss him of.  
   
But even that I cannot distracts Luke of the disaster that it was safe would reveal in any minute. Reluctant, it let go, but his hand remained in his waist whereas it gave return again to the stove.  
   
"Lorelai"  
   
"If, my love" she requested, teasing it with the caseoso of endearment that the same hated one of the beginning. Two years now, and she still damn thing insisted on the annoyance of him with that love my.  
   
"That is those blue and yellow and green and red things in crepe" It pushed crepe in skillet to see if he could calculate it towards outside by tact only, and she pege slightly its hand.  
   
"They happen to be habas of jelly" Indicated Lorelai proud, as if she as soon as she comes for above with a prescription that would gain the Pillsbury cooks to the dull furnace.  
   
"This joking"  
   
"I never joke with you. Authorization, I do to cabrito you all the hour but still, this time I am serious." She moved of a pull the overflow of crepe in the air, and tried to take it in a plate. Of course, it lacked totally, but Luke handled to take it before it struck the floor.  
   
"Yay" Lorelai cried out against, giving a fast hug him around its center. "It knew that it comes in the practitioner of a day."  
   
"I am happy to be on watch,"  Luke absent saying, examining crepe more close by. Yes, those were in fact habas of jelly in which he. "You know," he said to him, "every time I I think that you cannot possibly make any thing crazier, you go next and she proves to me bad."  
   
"and this he is exactly porqué I make things like this. I always have taste to push on, Lorelai Gilmore, extraordinaire of the fin of the pusher of on and of crepe, "she said with prospering, moving of a pull one second crepe and handling to really take it it with skillet. Before he could make more questions, a buzzer was extinguished.  
   
"I am scared of pregunatar," Luke said.  
   
"coffle is ready"  
   
"and now really I am scared to ask," Luke I complained, watching its spraying of the wife through the kitchen to the iron of the cake that she had covered in the wall. He watched it to clear a cake that watched slightly dark. "We have an iron of the cake"  
   
Lorelai put the cake in a plate and that him gave it. "We it obtained it when we were placed and never we used it. I think that there is the time to use it. Nobody wishes a virginal manufacturer of the cake "  
   
Luke watched the cake with the agitation. "that he left the iron of the cake, but porqué is east color"  
   
"Because he is coffle" Clarify Lorelai, but does not clarify any thing.  
   
"and that is coffle"  
   
"Nothing. That he is coffle with you " she teased behind, then seated down in the table with her plate of crepes of haba of jelly. Luke seated down also, and finishes of sight his fixedly ' coffle.'  Lorelai gave an ample face him, and he almost forgot of how he is crazy was this morning as he made does not stop the first time and he does not stop the last one how he is lucky was. "coffle is a cake that was done with entered coffee. Coffee. Cake. Coffle "  
   
Luke gave the plate him. "It thinks that you must have it. Solomento has a little juice."  
   
"Okay, but you do not know that she lacks" Lorelai this aloud.  
   
Luke obtained its juice and watched Lorelai to eat invented the most repugnant articles of the food since then put mantequilla and the jelly of peanut in the same jar. On halfway to traverse its food, something dawn in him. Then convirtio of the dawn a ferocious and intense ardent knowledge.  
   
Shot of Luke outside its chair so quickly lowered above. "Ay God mio" he shouted, excited. "he is embarrassed"  
   
Lorelai watched it with a mouthful of crepe of haba of coffle and jelly. Slowly, very very very slowly, it finished chewing and swallowed. Then she sacudarió its head. "I am not embarrassed, Luke."  
   
Luke frunció the frown. "But, this is crazy food. And the pregnant women eat the crazy food. They have those strange desires. I speak the right "  
   
"If But I am not embarrassed," she said to him again.  
   
"But..." requested he, watching its food (if that could be called).  
   
"I am hardly insano," it assured it, and finished of the last mordeduras of her breakfast. Later it fell plates in the sink and went to obtain dressed for the work, leaving to her husband who marvelled itself in the fact that after all this time, she could immovable surprise it.  
   
Finite! 


	2. McCoy English McCoy The REAL deal

This is the original, as I wrote it. Again, Fluff Warning.

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Title: Jelly Beancakes and Coffles

Author: Connecticut Junkie

Summary: Lorelai tries to cook breakfast. Of course, with Lorelai, even breakfast is weird.

Rating: G

Note: I noticed that there were no GG fics in Spanish, so I whipped this up. And yes, I've actually made Jellybean pancakes and Coffles before. They're gross.

Disclaimer: These characters are not mine and have been dubbed for your reading pleasure.

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Luke entered the kitchen, and to his surprise saw that Lorelai was cooking. 

"Okay. I must be dreaming or insane."

"I vote for insanity," Lorelai said, attempting to flip a pancake. 

"What the hell is that?" Luke asked, as he got a good view of said pancake (if it could be called that.)

"It's a pancake, silly," Lorelai retorted, then turned away from her cooking (if it could be called that) to give him a good morning kiss.

But even that couldn't distract Luke from the disaster that he was sure would unfold at any minute. Reluctantly, he let her go, but his hand stayed at her waist as she turned back to the stove.

"Lorelai?"

"Yes, my love?" she asked, teasing him with the cheesy endearment he'd hated from the very start. Two years now, and she still insisted on annoying him with that damn 'my love' thing. 

"What are those blue and yellow and green and red things in the pancake?" He poked the pancake in the skillet to see if he could figure it out by touch alone, and she lightly smacked his hand.

"Those happen to be Jelly beans!" Lorelai proudly stated, as if she'd just come up with a recipe that would win the Pillsbury Bake Off.

"You have got to be kidding me."

"I never kid you. Okay, I do kid you all the time but still, this time I'm serious." She flipped the pancake high into the air, and tried to catch it on a plate. Of course, she missed completely, but Luke managed to catch it before it hit the floor.

"Yay!" Lorelai exclaimed, giving him a quick hug around his middle. "I knew you'd come in handy one of these days."

"Pleased to be of service," Luke absently said, examining the pancake more closely. Yes, those were indeed Jelly beans in it. "You know," he told her, "every time I think you can't possibly do anything more crazy, you go ahead and prove me wrong."

"And that is exactly why I do things like this. I always like to push the envelope. Lorelai Gilmore, Envelope Pusher and Pancake Flipper extraordinaire," she said with a flourish, flipping a second pancake and managing to actually catch it with the skillet. Before he could ask anymore questions, a buzzer went off.

"I'm almost afraid to ask," Luke said.

"The coffle is ready!"

"And now I really am afraid to ask," Luke grumbled, watching his wife dash across the kitchen to the waffle iron that she had plugged into the wall. He watched her remove a slightly dark looking waffle. "Hey. We have a waffle iron?"

Lorelai put the waffle on a plate and handed it to him. "We got it when we registered and we never used it. I figured I'd break it in. No one wants a virgin waffle iron!"

Luke looked at the waffle with trepidation. "I know it came out of the waffle iron, but why is it this color?"

"Because it's a coffle!" Lorelai clarified, only it didn't clarify anything.

"And what's a coffle?"

"Nothing. What's a coffle with you?" she teased back, then sat down at the table with her plate of jelly bean pancakes. Luke sat down too, and just stared at his 'coffle.' Lorelai gave him a wide grin, and he almost forgot how crazy this morning was as he realized not for the first time and not for the last how lucky he was. "A coffle is a waffle that was made with coffee in it. Coffee. Waffle. Coffle!"

Luke gave her the plate. "I think you should have it. I'll just have some juice."

"Okay, but you don't know what you're missing!" Lorelai called out.

Luke got his juice and watched Lorelai eat the most disgusting food items invented ever since they put peanut butter and jelly in the same jar. About halfway through her meal, something dawned on him. Then the dawn became a fierce and intense burning knowledge.

Luke shot out of his chair so fast it fell over. "Oh my god," he shouted, pointing excitedly at her. "You're pregnant!" 

Lorelai looked at him with a mouthful of coffle and jelly bean pancake. Slowly, very very very slowly, she finished chewing and swallowed. Then she shook her head. "I'm not pregnant, Luke."

Luke frowned. "But this is crazy food. And pregnant women eat crazy food. They have those weird cravings. Right?"

"Right. But I'm not pregnant," she told him again.

"But...?" he asked, looking at her food (if it could be called that).

"I'm just insane," she assured him, and finished off the last few bites of her breakfast. Then she dropped the dishes in the sink and went to get dressed for work, leaving her husband marveling at the fact that after all this time, she could still surprise him.

The End

~ ~ ~ ~ 

So ends the insanity experiment. Any thoughts?


End file.
